Cy, I Suck

Twins 3, Padres 1

In usual news, I suck at life and Kevin Slowey is gorgeous/pitches to perfection (NEARLY, okay?) each/every time he graces the mound with his presence. Yep, I said it.

I'd also like to tell Jesse Crain that it is not a-okay to spoil 6 shutout innings from Kevin with suckishness. I think it would be best if I told him to personally use his Crain-ium in situations such as that. Oohh, yuck, that was a bad joke.

Thanks, Brendan Harris, for saving Crain's behind with a home run after sucking it up big time earlier in the game. Also, way to go Brian Buscher. Show Mike Lamb and his scruffy beard how it's done.

Not making any calls on this one, folks, but I'm just going to say that Perkins can and should pitch nicely tonight. At 1.5 games back, we are almost ready to squash the Bitch Sox. Here's to wishing!

What Does Top of the World Feel Like?

Celtics 131, Lakers 92

I am not an NBA fan by any means.

However, I watched the end of almost all the Finals games. And watching Kevin Garnett force his way through the Lakers tonight to win a blowout with 26 points, 14 rebounds, 3 steals and 4 assists, made me wish I watched and played basketball.

The raw emotion that Kevin Garnett showed after being pulled in the 4th.. the emotion that you could see pounding through his veins when the game was finished made me believe he was a champion. If there was any doubt in my mind, it was crushed tonight. And to know that in the postgame, when Kevin Garnett was being interviewed, he gave us all a shout-out. When asked about winning the title, you know what he said?

"This is for everybody in 'Sota, everybody in Chicago..."

I'm honored to know that I saw him play in person.
Absolutely honored.



I am not an NBA fan by any means.

However, watching the postgame celebration and interviews brought tears to my eyes. Why? I don't know. Maybe it was because my J.O. volleyball team doesn't know how to work together and I'm sick of it. The sole emotion that I show when I get home is frustration, not happiness. Not celebration. Winning something like that is breathtaking. Sure, my J.O. volleyball team is not even close to being equivalent to the NBA Finals. However, I'm never going to be a player on the NBA Finals team. I'll never know what it feels like.

Seeing their celebration and the joy that was spread across their faces? It was.. amazing. How else do I describe? Kevin Garnett is a leader. Paul Pierce is a leader. Ray Allen is a leader. Surprisingly, Rajon Rondo was a leader. In fact, the whole team were leaders. They were heroes. And Kobe Bryant couldn't be the savior this time.

Congratulations to the Boston Celtics. Honestly, seeing what I saw tonight?
You wouldn't want it any other way.

I ♥ #7.. right?

Twins 10, Brewers 2
Twins 9, Brewers 4 (12)
Brewers 4, Twins 2

Basically, Friday was entertaining to me to the highest degree, and it was supremely adorable to top it all off. So, Kevin Slowey? Thanks for the laughs because I needed them. Also, I'd like to thank my boy for allowing me to stay up until 2 in the morning when I had a volleyball tournament the next day. Thanks, Kevin!

I would have to say the Brewers are my favorite NL team. I don't follow them (the only other team, besides the Twins, that I follow = the Rays) but I have always had a deep love for Wisconsin (thank you, Brett Favre) so I guess it channels, you know?

I also have come to the assumption that while you MAY love Joe Mauer, when we play the Brewers, my favorite #7 would be J. J. Hardy. Trust me, I love some Baby Jesus! But there is no denying that the Brewers' shortstop is absolutely GORGEOUS, and is an All-Star regardless of what his numbers say. Upon learning that he's hurt for this series, I was pissed off to the supreme. It's always fun not seeing your favorite player on the opposing team play!

It's nice to know we're incapable of sweeping.

Congratulations to Scott Baker for recording 4 strikeouts in an inning and becoming the first Twin to do so. If I was a pitcher I would have to continue to throw wild pitches until the bases were loaded just so I could get the max of strikeouts in an inning. And that, my friends, is why I don't play professional baseball.

Almost R.I.P.

Wow, I suck.

Oh well. What do you mean, the Twins have lost 6 consecutive games? Uhh, oh. I guess I missed them. It's just.. well, the only thing that's been on my mind so far this summer:



I miss him.. so much.

A Lot of Things Were Swept Today

Twins 3, Bitch Sox 1
Twins 4, Bitch Sox 3
Twins 11, Tiggers 1
Twins 4, Tiggers 1
Twins 7, Tiggers 6

....including my kitchen and the Tigers.

First off: HAPPY FREAKIN' BIRTHDAY TO a man who has respectfully captured my wholesome heart: KEVIN SLOWEY! And to Matt Tolbert, who also is adorable, but it's Kevin Michael Slowey's birthday. Seriously. And apparently he's going to be called up on Thursday to pitch instead of on the 10th, Saturday. Which I'm totally fine with except for the fact that.. uh, well, the Thursday game is at 2:05. And you know what? I'm a student and therefore I will probably be in SCHOOL. Gee freaking WHIZ. It was like that last time, on the 4th, when he got hurt? It was a day game and I was at school. So I missed it and was stuck with SQUEEZE PLAY. Whoopee?

In other news: S.W.E.E.P.
Seriously. How glorious this feels. 5 straight and #1 in the A.L. Central, baby. However, it came with some casualties, like Carlos getting smacked in the head and Scott Baker getting yanked in consecutive starts because of his groin injury. Which makes me giggle, but seriously, I really don't find it that funny. It's just a humorous word.



Yeah. I can't think of anything else to say, so. Bring on the Bitch Sox!

Just Because.

Rangers 10, Twins 0



Because we all need to cheer up a little bit on this off day, yeah?

P.S. Hey Kevin Slowey:
How about you come back? Like.. NOW? Thanks.

Baker's Dozen (... kinda)

Twins 12, Rangers 6

And while my "call" was not correct tonight, I had a blast watching the game tonight. I actually happened to take notes.

- In the third, a grounder rolls past Brendan Harris (who's known for his lack-of-range) and continues rolling into center. To me it looked like Craig Monroe, playing center for the injured Carlos Gomez, was just sauntering slowly over to the ball; Michael Cuddyer, playing right, must've gotten kind of maddened on account of Monroe's lack of hustle, because he ran in front of him and got the ball instead.
- Beginning of the fourth they showed a tiny kid wearing a Rangers hat that had airbrushed art on the side. He was eating a hot dog, and to me he looked like a major poser. I said to my mom something about his "gangsta" hat, and she followed with: "he looks pretty 'white bread' to me."
- I wrote on my sheet that "doritos are orgasmic." Yeah, I was eating them.
- Scott Baker strained a groin muscle. Now this marks that both my sister and I have lost boyfriends to injury. Myself having Kevin Slowey, her having Scott.
- Murphy's batting stance irritated me throughout the game.
- I told my dad that when we go to a Twins game this summer, I'm bringing a sign. Dad: "What, circle me Bart?" Me: "-lett." It made my parents chuckle.
- My mom calls Jarrod Saltalamacchia "Rainbow" because his name arcs around his number on his jersey. She also calls Ponson "Pontoon" after I told her that was his nickname from us Minnesotans. "I don't know what his real name is!"
- Me: "See, now, what would we be doing if I hadn't started watching the Twins?" Dad: "Watching something I actually want to watch." (He's a closet Twins fan. He refuses to admit he enjoys watching baseball..)
- Mom: "When's Michael's baby due again?" Me: "June, maybe?" Dad: ".. he's pregnant?"
- Dad: "Bases loaded. I hope Nicky's not up. Hey, Mike [Lamb], how about you do a little something for Bambi?"
- After seeing a commercial that featured a guy in a fugly sweater, my sister and I broke into a rousing chorus of "'CAUSE WHEN YOU'RE WEARING A STRIPED SWEATER..!"
- Dad: "Who's this?" Me: "MATT TOLBERT! He's like my boyfriend. I love him."
- Me: Dad, who's your Twins boyfriend? Dad: I don't lead an alternative lifestyle.
- My sister thinks that Max, my cat's, boyfriend is T.C. I said, "No, it has to be a player." Kara then said something about "Well T.C. is a playa!"
- My dad now calls Dennys Reyes "Sampler Plate."
- I didn't know Mauer could BUNT!
- My dad then said, "I think Delmon Young is my 'hero'." Me: "Oh, you mean your boyfriend?"
- Kara: 'All you can eat seats'? Cool, I want to eat a seat.
- Matt Tolbert has an uncanny ability to run into people on first base. The first inning, he ran into Pontoon at first, and then fell on his ass.. and later, probably in the 8th or so?, he ran into the first basemen again.
- We switched the channel to see what the score was for the Celtics game (they lost.) and when we went back, we saw Michael rounding the bases. "WE MISSED CUDDY'S HOME RUN? WHAT?!"
- My mom, after watching Neshek pitch a couple of outs: "Why does he put his butt out like that?"
- Bobby Korecky is short. Well, looking at his stats he's like 5'11, but I never said he was Nick Punto short.
- After watching Delmon Young's interview during Twins Live, I have come to the realization that he loves the word "uhhh."

I have decided I'm going to start a so-called "boyfriend of the day" to give me inspiration to actually change my blog around and make it not so.. boring. But since that's really common, I need to think of a different name for the prized ranking. I'll figure out what to call it later. It's late, and I'm tired. I know, I'm a weenie.

I'll also add a "boyfriend" section. So that those players who have stolen my heart, along with my family's, will be listed. So, if you want to stalk me, you know who I love. There you go.

And yes, in case you were wondering? I am a tagging whore. Thanks.